So I spent a lot of this morning shooting some half dozen clips with my webcam. What can I say, I like making money while I sleep! But anyway, after spending all this time getting stuff set up, troubleshooting so that I didn't break my computer's CPU while shooting, futzing with lighting, and finally signing up for a store on clips4sale, I can't upload anything. I can't log in via FTP, I can't use their little uploader (IO errors over and over and over again), and I'm just stuck. Add to that that my computer hard-crashed while I was shooting (yay for choking on data) and then almost died again while I was in the chat room, I'm a little unhappy with modern technology. Won't somebody just fix it for me?
I had some interesting discussion topics in my head (still do, really), but I'm tired and frustrated, so it's not a good time for me to be expounding on the niceties of capitalization, topping from the bottom, findom, the good of greed, the vagaries of CBT, creativity in BDSM. . . I'll just blurt out something, add in some swear words, and sign off. Not good reading, nor is it good writing.
Maybe part of it is my current worries over money. I finally sat down and took a good hard look at my finances, and the picture is less than pretty. Given my (a) debt from the move and (b) paycut from a real job to grad school, I have a lot of digging to do to get myself out of this hole. The worst part is knowing that if I were willing to ignore my boundaries for a little while, it would be nothing to come up with the $ required to pay off all my debt in full. Unfortunately, the total is more than 3 months of aftertax stipend dollars, and given my need for things like food, shelter, cat food, and books, I'm not seeing myself as paying it off that fast. Besides, I want to build up a 6 month cushion in my savings account, plus an emergency car fund (around 2k) and the start of a down payment. I know I can be creative in budgeting, and I've gotten some interesting paying modeling gigs recently; it's only a matter of time and discipline.
But why can't I just discipline somebody else instead? Curses.
Tags: computer, cam, clips4sale, chat, webcam, bitching
